He Eats Asparagus, Why Can't You Be That Way? testo
Barry Louis Polisar
Testo
Whenever I am naughty, whenever I am bad
Whenever I do something that makes my parents mad
Like the time I bit the mailman or left stuff on the floor
My parent's say, "Why can't you be like the boy who lives next door?"
He always makes his bed and he always eats his food
He likes his itty, bitty sister and he's never ever rude,
And when I don't eat what's on my plate, my parents both will say,
"He Eats Asparagus, why can't you be that way?"
He is never dirty, he always takes a bath,
He loves to do his homework too, especially math.
At school he is an angel, he always sits up straight,
He's always very helpul and he never comes in late.
He always says, "I'm sorry," "Excuse me," "Thank you," "Please,"
He always dresses nicely, not like me.
He's never spilt his milk, lost a glove or slammed a door,
Stuck out his tongue or giggled in school or left things on the floor
He goes to bed at nine each night and brushes all his teeth,
And Mommy wishes I was him and that he was me.
I've never even seen him burp, he does what he is told,
But the boy next door is thirty four years old
Whenever I do something that makes my parents mad
Like the time I bit the mailman or left stuff on the floor
My parent's say, "Why can't you be like the boy who lives next door?"
He always makes his bed and he always eats his food
He likes his itty, bitty sister and he's never ever rude,
And when I don't eat what's on my plate, my parents both will say,
"He Eats Asparagus, why can't you be that way?"
He is never dirty, he always takes a bath,
He loves to do his homework too, especially math.
At school he is an angel, he always sits up straight,
He's always very helpul and he never comes in late.
He always says, "I'm sorry," "Excuse me," "Thank you," "Please,"
He always dresses nicely, not like me.
He's never spilt his milk, lost a glove or slammed a door,
Stuck out his tongue or giggled in school or left things on the floor
He goes to bed at nine each night and brushes all his teeth,
And Mommy wishes I was him and that he was me.
I've never even seen him burp, he does what he is told,
But the boy next door is thirty four years old
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.A Bee Will Sting You
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.A Brontosaurus With Bronchitis
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.Accident
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.A Clock Without A C
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.A Giggle And A Hug And A Tickle And A Kiss
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.All I Want Is You
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.Ant And The Grasshopper
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.A Sick Song
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.As You Sleep So Peacefully
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.Aunt Anna Came To Our House
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.Apple Of My Eye
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.Bad Boys
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.Bad Guys Broke Into Our Car
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.Barnyard Stomp
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.Bumblebee Song
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.But I'm Just Thirteen
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.But They'll Never Have A Baby As Nice As Me
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.Callie Wallie Doodle All The Day
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.Chameleon
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.Caterpillar
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.Cindy Absent
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.Crab
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.Dad Says That I Look Like Him
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.Diaper Rash
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.Dinosaur Song
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.Dog Barked
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.Doo-doo Is A Bad Word
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.Don't Leave Me In The House Alone
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.Don't Wake Up The Baby Or The Baby Will Get You
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.Don't You Cry, Now Don't You Fuss
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.Don't Put Your Finger Up Your Nose
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.Don't Eat The Food That Is Sitting On Your Plate
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.Donuts
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.Do This, Do That
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.Early Sunday Morning
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.Ellen Grew A Beard
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.Elvin And The Witch (See The Witch)
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.Everywhere You Go
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.First It Bit My Behind
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.Five More Minutes
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.I Used To Have a Sister
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.Fred
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.Get Your Hand Off My Leg And Your Foot Out Of My Shoe
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.Giggle Tickle Fiddle Little Wiggle Around
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.Go And Hush The Baby
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.Have A Little Smoke?
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.Hey Jack, What's In The Sack?
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.Homemade Band
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.I Am Very Sad To Say That Cindy Won't Be Out To Play (See Cindy's Absent)
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.I Can Do Anything
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.I Can't, I Can't
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.I Can't Tie My Shoe
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.I'd Be Me
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.I Didn't Mean To
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.I Don't Believe You're Going To The Bathroom
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.I Don't Brush My Teeth And I Never Comb My Hair
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.I Don't Wanna Go To School
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.I Eat Kids
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.I Forgot
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.If You've Got A Kid Who Complains All The Time
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.I Looked Into The Mirror, What Did The Mirror Say?
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.I Lost My Pants
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.I Love Your Eyes
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.I Miss Grandma
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.I'm A Slug
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.I'm A Three-Toed, Triple-Eyed, Double-Jointed Dinosaur
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.I'm Bored
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.I'm Late
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.I Need You Like A Donut Needs A Hole
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.I Never Did Like You Anyhow Stomp
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.I Sneaked Into The Kitchen In The Middle Of The Night
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.I Still Don't Like Asparagus
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.It All Comes Back To Me
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.It's My Mother And My Father And My Sister And The Dog
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.Hands And Kilometers
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.I've Got A Dog And My Dog's Name Is Cat
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.Louder
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.I've Got A Teacher, She's So Mean
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.I Wanna Be A Dog
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.I Wanna Be Your Baby
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.Leroy Is A Late Bloomer
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.Lucky To Be Alive
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.Lullaby For A Crying Baby
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.Marching Shoulder To Shoulder
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.Marvin Doesn't Like The New Baby
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.Me And You
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.Mom And Dad Are Always Right
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.Mommy, Mommy, I Gotta Get A Record (See Everywhere You Go)
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.Mom Said No I Said Why
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.My Brother Thinks He's A Banana
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.My Brother Threw Up On My Stuffed Toy Bunny
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.My Dentist Is An Awfully Nice Man
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.My Friend Jake
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.My Mother Ran Away Today
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.My Name Is Hiram Liplshlitz
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.Never Cook Your Sister In A Frying Pan
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.Not So Good At Baseball
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.Nothing
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.Oh No, I Like My Sister
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.One Big Happy Family
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.One Day My Best Friend Barbara Turned Into A Frog
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.Our Dog Bernard
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.Poor Orville Thlapp
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.Potty Training
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.Reptile World
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.Sally Eats Shoelaces, Straw And String
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.Shut Up In The Library
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.Siamese Twins
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.Skatter-Brack Flath Who Lives In My Bath
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.Stanley Stole My Shoelace And Rubbed It In His Armpit
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.That's What Makes The World Go 'Round
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.There's No Substitute For A Cat
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.These Are Not My Children
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.They Said Eat The Broccoli
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.Thump Thump Thump
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.Tomorrow
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.Town Of Round
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.To Mommy (See One Big Happy Family)
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.Trouble....What Trouble?
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.Tyrannosaurus Nix
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.Underwear
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.You're As Sweet As Sugar On A Stick
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.Warning
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.Water
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.We Don't Have To Share
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.Wet Again
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.What Are We Gonna Do About The Baby?
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.What Do We Do With A Crying Baby?
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.What If A Zebra Had Spots?
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.When Suzie Sneezed
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.When The House Is Dark And Quiet
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.Who Got A Boo-Boo?
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.Why Do I Love You?
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.The Witch
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.Alfabet Song
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.Craster